Wednesday, May 31, 2017

Scared of Saying Something Negative.

With the news about my grandma and my bestie being able to talk just for a little bit... I'm not sure what I want to say or do anymore.

I'm literally scared right now for saying something negative, if not already.

Anyway, I am going to stay away from LINE and other stuff just for a bit... I am really tired and need to sleep right now. I might be waiting until 10 to sleep but for now... I think I will watch some stuff either on YouTube or on Netflix. Full screen if I can too...

I just... really don't feel like talking much.

That's all.

With love,

BDK

It's The Wait For News That's Hard

Each everyday that passes, it's the news will be hard. Mostly waiting for anything about my grandma.

There's no time limit right now and well, we can only hope.

Anyway, I think I will soon get over the fact that my bestie can't contact me. I will be waiting for news from him. I hope things will be alright for him.

Right now, I am just really sleepy. I might lay down later or read... not sure yet.

This post will not be marked important right now. Until the moment comes, that's when I'll mark it as important or eventful.

It sucks to sit here every single day and stare at these walls xD I would do anything to have a job or something...

Alright, just mumbling about things that don't make sense at all.

That's all.

With love,

BDK

Tuesday, May 30, 2017

Not The News We Needed To Hear

I am writing this early but I feel like I needed to get this off my chest before the night comes.

The cancer doctor told my grandma that the best thing for her right now is... hospice. They are going to call them in for her. And try to help her to the best possible way.

I really want a hug but I can only imagine for now since my bestie is not able to communicate right now.

Cancer sucks.

However, for now, I hope my grandma lives for as long as she is able to. I will let her know always how much I love her and care for her. Let her know that everything will be alright for me.

Sure, I will cry whenever that day comes but for now... I must keep strong for her and my family to the best way possible. As my bestie would say to me... I'll be fine. Thank you, even if you're not able to communicate with me right now, I know you are telling me that sometimes xD

We can't predict anything just yet but I wanted to keep you all updated on the progress. These last few years have been the toughest times for my grandma and I don't blame her for not suffering anymore... even though she is in pain right now. I can only hope for the good instead of the bad. The good as in... hope the suffering ends soon.

I hope that you get to read this, my bestie. And I hope you imagine giving me the biggest hug there is.

That's all.

With love,

BDK

Holiday Weekend Finally Over

Holiday weekend is finally over. I don't know about you all but I can tell a huge change on how much I eat... I don't really eat that much like I used to. Not sure if it's because of the surgery almost three weeks ago or what... but my eating habits has changed drastically.

Anyway, today, I am going to start distracting myself so I wouldn't be leaving loads of random messages on my bestie's chats xD Noticed that I said chats... I know I'll miss him more and more each day that passes. Alright, enough of that. Gonna stop. Only concentrate on myself for now. I'm sure he is concentrating on himself too.

My grandma is suppose to go see the cancer doctor today. I hope that she would find out some stuff. But I can't be sure until after my mom talks to her later in the day. I hope my grandma does go and see what to do. She's already decided not to do some stuff which I will talk about in the second post.

Alright, time to go and find something to do.

That's all.

With love,

BDK

Monday, May 29, 2017

Does It Get Better?

I know my bestie will be without communication for a while. But does this get better? With missing him and stuff? I am waiting for him. I really need to stay away from the computer so that I won't be messaging him a lot of mumbo jumbo xD As well as, putting a load of status updates about missing him or wondering how he ish. I know it inside that he is fine. He'll be fine. Being a monk takes full commitment and I hope that he does really well. Besides, at least he has an excuse for having bald head full time now. :D Then he would be reading this one day and be like "You're weird, Brandy" He already knows how I am so I'm sure he's trying his best to figure something out.

I don't know what else to put here so I feel like I needed to take some things off my chest. This post will not be listed as important or eventful because I don't want to keep doing this thing on and on. And it's only been a day. So it'll be alright. It will be no time before 4 months pass.

I don't want to seem obsessive over him either. So I need to get things out of my chest and head for a few days after he's gone.  Then slowly just wait for him without no worries and still miss him a little.

So, to my bestie, I hope you don't mind me doing this. It will only be for a few days, I hope.

It doesn't help the fact that I didn't really go anywhere. Just to the graveyard to put some stuff on them. Honoring, I guess you could say. It's something that you do sometimes... give offerings to those who pass? I think... one day, this tradition will die out for me. I don't really feel like it anymore. With grandma being sick and my stress levels at an edge... I'm not sure what to do xD

Anyway, I shouldn't keep doing this. I should stay positive for my bestie. So... sowwy for this random post.

That's all.

With love,

BDK

PS: O_O A weird feeling came over me and I don't know why.

Happy Memorial Day~

Today, in America, is the celebration of a holiday that honors those who has passed. Hint the name "Memorial." Usual, this day is honoring those who served many wars. And have passed either during war or after war.

My grandpa whom died when I was just a kid was in Korea War. He brought home to my dad's mother, whom died when my dad was just a child, many stuff from Korea. I wished I still had those items but they were destroyed by a family dog :'(

I want to ask my dad if he still has those items from Korea but I do not think he does. They were a beautiful bracelets made of some type of cheap metal. Sometimes, I wished my family were a bit careful with items that were that precious. These were memories of my grandpa to my dad's mom.

Anyway, I am about to go to the grave where my dad's mom is buried. She died when my dad was just a child during childbirth. Both her and the child had died. Then soon after my grandpa married Eliza. And well... my dad had a rough childhood. This is why my dad is the way he is now.

Such a tragic family story. I wish to write  a story about stories that my family told me one day. That would eventually come to my life story.

On with the day, although I am not feeling too good.

That's all.

With love,

BDK

PS: Sometimes, I think Rai, my bestie, is reading my blogs... You do know, you're welcome to comment anytime if you are. xD

Sunday, May 28, 2017

Might End Up Sleeping Early Tonight xD

My brother and his fiance came by today. They decided to celebrate two of their kids' birthday early and with us. We had fun. :D

I'm a bit tired so I might end up going to bed early.

In fact, there might be days that I will go to bed early or read in bed early.

I might lost my mood in playing games a lot now, but I got my mood into listening to music while reading books now.

I might not list this post as eventful because nothing really else happened besides my brother and the rest coming by.

Kids are fun and all, but they do wear you out. xD

That's all.

With love,

BDK

Yesterday A Long Day, Fell Asleep, Saw My Bestie Off With His Journey

Yesterday, I had a long day.  My mom's computer was thankfully caught in the nick of time. My brother made sure there's nothing else there. He made sure her computer was updated. Made sure she had more than three virus softwares xD So, my mom's computer is fine now.

We went to Sand Hill, to the graveyard there to put some stuff on my grandma and grandpa graves. Their names are Eliza (my dad's step mom but my grandma) and Milton Kirby. My grandpa whom I always called Pa Kirby served the Korean War. I took pictures so those are somewhere on twitter xD

Also, I saw my bestie off with his journey. He's gonna be away for 4 months being a monk. He hopes to try to talk some days and me too. I will miss him but I will wait for him.  I am glad that he won't be fully alone. I won't say much about that.

Anyway, I am listing this post as eventful because I just wanted to say that I almost missed my bestie before he left but lucky, I woke up in time to see him get on that plane. Then I stayed awake long enough to see him off to monk hood.

I never went on my computer because of the storms that came late yesterday. So I couldn't update my blog to talk about anything.

I went to my grandma today and she wasn't feeling too good right as we left so we decided to let her sleep.

Hope my bestie gets some time to read some of my blogs. :D

That's all.

With love,

BDK

Friday, May 26, 2017

Getting Sleepy Early And Some Idea...

I might not do this every single day since that would take a lot to read. But if anything interesting happens to me during the summer only from this weekend to sometime in September, I will be adding more details about that day only. It won't be everyday. And I'll try my best to add a label for that purpose.

I am doing this so that I won't have to leave a looooooooooooooooooooooooooong list of messages to my bestie xD

I'll tell him before he leaves so he knows why I am doing this idea.

I might not get to see him off because I am not feeling good right now. Sowwy.

Anyway, I will let you all know when there's a detailed post coming. It's not gonna be like every day. And those posts will be labeled as important or eventful.

With my grandma being sick and my need to escape, I think some of those days will be important to write about as a way to calm my mind down. I don't need to get on Facebook, or twitter or anywhere else but here to talk about those.

Also, I will not be posting anything that is my own opinion about things anymore... Not until I know for sure what happens in the fall. If you are following the news about net neutrality, you would know the answer why.

Alright, enough of this. Starting now and until whatever, I will do some detailed days. Those will only be eventual or important days.

That's all.

With love,

BDK

PS: Wishing my bestie the best of luck too! I know he might not have time to read this but yea... you get it. xD

Well, Summer Starts After This Weekend xD

Today, there's no rain. Tomorrow, there's gonna be storms and stuff. Memorial Day weekend is here officially and I don't really want to go out in the rain at all.

Not sure what to do right now. I'm guess to enjoy the silence for a while xD

My bestie leaves tomorrow for 4 months. I sure hope it would pass by no problem. He's taking Kirby with him so that's all that matters to me owo I hope he gets to keep in the beds there xD

Anyway, I won't talk about him too much because I don't want to be constantly worried about him. Plus, there might be times he might find time to get online and check on things. Because you never know how things will be xD

Alright, I'm a bit sleepy but I need to go take a shower... so I will do that.

A bit tired too... Gah... don't be lazy, right now... xD

That's all.

With love,

BDK

Thursday, May 25, 2017

Things To Do For The Summer

Since summer is having a rainy start... meaning it's raining at least three to four times a week. So the weather is a bit cooler through the week. Next week, is officially the start of June.

And that means, my bestie will be away for a while too. So I will be finding things to do during those 4 months while he's away. All the while, I will be waiting for any news from him if he gets to chat online and stuff. I know it's strict to where he's going but one can hope.

One main thing is to earn a little extra money. I might not get rich overnight, but I can do surveys, videos, photos, and find online jobs to do.

Second thing I do want to try to do... write. Write and write... I want to get away from the computer on some days and just write and write. I'll use the computer to do research for some stories too. I will write with my heart's intent and share what I have after the 4 months are over.

Third thing? Try to go to places. I love nature and well, I rather not be home every other weekend. Maybe some weekends are worth staying home for but because there's so much stress right now going on, I really want to go outside and take a breather.

The rest of the plans? Well, I do want to record a video or two. Maybe try livestreaming early in the days. Try to catch up with Japanese lessons... Maybe do some practice videos of my progress? I can't really do webcams since there's an error with one of the programs. So I could use... my phone? Not sure yet. Then there's reading more too.

All the while, trying to stay away from my computer as much as possible. That's my main goal. I'm stressed enough with life right now and I rather not be afraid... and just stay positive. I'm doing this not only for myself but for my bestie. He would want me to find something to do while I wait for him to come back online xD

I really hope that where he's going... he can be able to find what he needs. Not sure what that is yet. We all don't know how things will be. But... we sometimes need a little time to get away from things.

I am still chasing my dreams. So... I will do my best. And not let stress take control of my life. I know life has a way of sneaking up on you. But... I need escape.

That's all.

With love,

BDK

It's Hard To Be Positive in This World

It's just hard. But at least, I can try to stay positive. Even if it means to pretend to stay positive xD

Anyway, I'm not sure what's going on or what, but I really wish Rai would tell me things sometimes xD

Right now, I just want everybody to stay positive for him. I am going to stay positive for him. :D

I am kind of sleepy right now but not sure if I get to nap or anything yet.

Well, this blog is short right now... I might have news for the second post tonight so we'll see what happens next.

That's all.

With love,

BDK

Wednesday, May 24, 2017

Magikarp Is The Weak Pokemon... And There's a Game for It. :V

There's a game on the phone of the useless pokemon, Magikarp called Magikarp Jump. :v

Thanks to my bestie for finding such a game :v Too random, folks.

Anyway, besides that will be my title tonight, I am sort of playing it because it seems to be addicting now xD

I had made a favorite song list on my YouTube as a playlist. Located here: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLI9REdoSEwgwcPxxejQ40yQQI4pbdSPE6

I'm too lazy to make that into a link so ah, well.

Alright, I'm not sure what I'm doing for the rest of night and I'm getting a bit sleepy so yay me...

Also, I'm gonna start writing soon... Just as an escape from the sad world around us. And plus, it's my dream to write stories so let's go.

That's all.

With love,

BDK

When The Weather Starts To Turn Bad

They are giving a thunderstorm warning up to I think until 6:30? While the news says tornado watch until 8PM.

So I am typing this as early as possible in case it does storm unexpectedly.

I am glad mom made dinner early too. And I hear a small rumble as I type this xD

I'm not big on storms these days...  So yay... not really yay.

Anyway, I'm gonna try to do some things before the storm comes.

Also, want to ask my bestie some stuff but he will tell me everything when he can xD Nothing serious xD Just glad he's safe.

That's all.

With love,

BDK

Tuesday, May 23, 2017

A Plan Ahead?

I am sleepy a bit but not really wanting to go to bed just yet. xD Might end up laying in bed and not sleep for another hour or so xD

I am almost healed but sleep is still important for the healing process xD

My day gotten better through the day and hope things will be alright tomorrow...

I don't know what to think about people anymore but I do know that I have a plan ahead.

Hopefully, once my mood gets better, I want to get back to surveys and more.

This is a short post so I might go and watch some YouTube before sleeping. Also, talk to my bestie before he goes somewhere for a bit.

That's all.

With love,

BDK

When One Thing Happens... Another Thing... Yea... You Get It.

My mom's computer got hacked. I won't say what it was. Just know that my brother is on it.

I was eating so that is why I am a little delay on writing this blog xD

Anyway, I am a little stressed out due to some things. I don't want to talk about them because my emotions are all mixed together.

Well, that's something that can't be helped.

And I got a planned anyway... so... yea...

Karma can be a pain but it can and will happen.

That's all.

With love,

BDK

Monday, May 22, 2017

Getting Sleepy Early And Hope It Doesn't Storm.

I'm getting sleepy. So I might end up going to bed early. Not sure what I'll be doing tomorrow... Had been given orders not to do any heavy lifting for another week. So yay... not really. I kind of miss lifting a bit.

Anyway, I am hoping it doesn't storm like it did last night. I didn't tell you all so I got a story to tell...

I believe in signs. Whether it's crazy or not, I kind of believe in it. Last night, I was gonna stay on the computer a while longer because you know... it wasn't lightning that bad or anything so I was like, "Nah, it won't do nothing serious." Then all of a sudden, this flash of bright light came and my computer shut off for a brief moment. And my mom's stereo came on. And... I freaked out. That was lightning for sure. I went to check around my computer to check for damage. I didn't smell smoke or anything. I even got brave and checked outside. Nothing, nada. I took this strange incident as a sign.

I have been given signs before many times and this is not really my first rodeo with lightning given me a sign without no damage. So... yea...

Tonight, I am still freaking out because I am scared of lightning too. It had done serious damage to my brother's computer so yea... you can see why I freak out over it.

Besides, I never been fond of ground lightning either.

So... that's my story of my life.

That's all.

With love,

BDK

Things Are Awesome With Doctor

Good news are always the best news. I'm healing wonderfully. Not in pain anymore. Maybe occasionally diarrhea but other than that.. I am fine.

I wanted to write before I left but I was distracted a bit xD

I am here now and well, I had to nap before coming on here. But I am here nonetheless.

Right now, I am going to try to eat... but there's no hope in rather or not this is going to make me sick. He advise me that if I can't eat it, don't force to eat it. Looks like I'm changing my eating habits for the better xD

Alright, I will try my best to post again. After the little incident with lightning, I'm a bit worried xD

That's all.

With love,

BDK

Sunday, May 21, 2017

It Was A Good Day But Tired Now...

Today, I went to my grandma's for the day. Saw my cousin and his family. Then saw my brother and his family. And together they were one big family. It had made my grandma feel better.

Cancer sucks. I know that I am at risk because as a child, I was sunburnt badly. I never dare to stand in the sun ever again because of that reason. Don't worry, I am trying every way to be healthy. And I hope that one day when I have a job, I can keep myself careful with doctor visits and more.

Anyway, I am alright, just a bit tired.

I might end up sleeping around 10ish or 11ish. I won't say for sure because I am always doing something else xD

Tomorrow, I got the doctor visit. I'm sure he will take the strips off my abdominal finally to check on the places. Not even sure if they gave me stitches or not yet xD

I'm gonna try to update before I go and update at night about what happened while there xD

That's all.

With love,

BDK

Saturday, May 20, 2017

Out And About Day

Today was actually a nice day so I got to go out and about for a bit. I felt better than usual.

Well, except maybe for one time run to the bathroom... tmi, yea...

I went to some yard sales for a bit then went to Walmart. I figured out that eggs... are my worst enemy right now. Well, anything with harsh proteins it seems. Now I can have egg whites (hint why I love white cakes a lot).

I do know yesterday, I finally can eat peanut butter as long as it's light. It's gonna be a strange time...

Anyway, I know that I have been posting one posts during the weekends but that's only because sometimes I do get tired really easily whenever I am out.

I will be going to my grandma's for the day tomorrow... so I hope to have a good time there. I might try to walk a little bit... but we'll see. Sometimes, going places right now just makes me really tired after a couple of hours. That's usually normal except that I have to go to nap time.

I might end up going to bed early tonight too because I am still healing a lot. I might watch a video or two before than.

I'll post one post again tomorrow but there's no time schedule for that so I will write whenever I feel like it... Just like I did today.

Expect me to take a nap tomorrow before I get on my computer again xD

That's all.

With love,

BDK

Friday, May 19, 2017

Doing My Best

I'm doing my best right now. I hope that tomorrow will be good since it's a Saturday... ok, I am being a little strange right now xD

Anyway, I was gonna watch some random movies in a moment so I hope that things will be good later in the day. I don't really have any shows to watch tonight either so boo.

I am watching a bit of YouTube right now. All the while, I am waiting to see how my stomach is handling a bit more solid foods... Hope I don't feel sick or anything.

I might keep this post short only for the purpose that I don't know what to say right now xD

There might or might not be another post later... We'll see.

That's all.

With love,

BDK

Thursday, May 18, 2017

Wonder If It Will Storm Tonight...

The weather has been strange lately and I am not sure how the weather is gonna be later on tonight as I sleep.

I might end up sleeping early tonight since I really don't feel too good right now. That kind of sucks too because I wanted to try to stay up longer each night. Ah, well... Gotta try to heal, I guess.

Some news had came about my grandma today. They have decided it would be better to call Hospice in for her. Which is not good at all. I know they will help her and stuff but I just hope that I can hold out emotionally for my grandma.

Right now, I am still got my mind on healing and stuff. I have been keeping a lot of stuff really quiet on FB for a purpose. I really don't need people right now... Some odd reason. Just my bestie who has been helpful today. He listens really well xD

Anyway, if I sleep, I will sleep. I just hope that I don't stay up too long to be in a worst mood ever.

That's all.

With love,

BDK

Really Slow Day

Today is really slow...

It was raining but during the sunshine xD Then it stopped. Now I am not sure what's gonna do. The weather man says they are giving storms with heavy rain. The bad thing about that... it might do that by the time my dad comes home from work. We are set to due for more groceries... yay...

Anyway, right now, I am a bit sleepy so I might end up going to nap land but this time I figure out that the way I am sitting is causing my stomach to hurt like crazy. I usually lay in a recliner chair to nap but that has proven to hurt my stomach now... so I'm just gonna lay down on my bed this time.

I will write another post later and hope for good things.

That's all.

With love,

BDK

Wednesday, May 17, 2017

Sometimes Silence Is Best?

I am about to go to bed. And I was just thinking about something earlier that I know my bestie must've been thinking too. Silence is the best thing... Although, sometimes you wonder if there's ever a possible way to earn this thing called silence.

I sometimes want to listen to music but other times I just want to close my eyes and listen to the silence.

Strange how me and my bestie were thinking of silence...

Anyway, for now I am going to go on to bed and hope to enjoy this time of silent... Except for an occasionally annoying dog xD

Praying for the best right now... That's all I can do.

That's all.

With love,

BDK

It's Officially A Week Now Since Surgery....

How I feel? Not completely 100% if you are wondering. It has been officially a week since having the surgery.

I have been good at bowel movement but bad at not eating some stuff that I'm so used to.

For now, I can only eat salads, small bits and ends of random stuff, chicken, and well... that's about it.

I can eat donuts some odd reason but the thing I really love to eat most is blueberry related stuff xD

I still have emotional problems due to having pain and stuff... I try to fight those as much as I can.

I hope that things will be alright for me as soon as Monday rolls around next week.

The strips that they put on my abdominal are slowly coming off and they have been proved to be itchy as heck.

I can deal with it, not to worry...

I do have a little worrying moments but thankfully, none of the things that I was worried about has happened... yet.

Let's just hope not.

Anyway, I think Saturday will be a tearful event for my bestie but I will pray for a safe journey for him. Hope he reads this and know that I will be praying for him. You are awesome,my bestie!

That's all.

With love,

BDK

Tuesday, May 16, 2017

Early To Sleep Again... x.x

I know I am healing but it kind of sucks to sleep early again... x.x

I think it's making me feel like crap if I don't go to sleep early so I will do that instead of staying up and feeling worse about things and myself xD

Anyway, this is a short post since I really do want to update on how's the area is on my tummy...

They are itchy. So that's a sign that they are healing on the outside now. Not sure how the insides are but I'm keeping an eye on that just in case.

I sometimes wish that I wasn't healing right at this time. I need a job and I need to get out of here.

But I won't be in a hurry because right now, what is important... is my grandma. I really need to be there for her. We can only wait and see what they say about the cancer in her mouth in 2 weeks. Such a long time but we have no choice but to wait.

I don't know if you all know about my grandma having cancer... I've been trying to block out a lot of things but some reason, people just keeps reminding me about it so I have no choice but to talk about it.

I really want somebody to talk to me about things but they are either stressed out or... having nobody to talk to at all. I don't like to make new friends that well now because of life xD

Oh, well... Hope Rai doesn't read this today and think he's bad... He's not, he's a good bestie and he's too special to me to be that bad xD

That's all.

With love,

BDK

Just Have To Eat Better For A While...

I just have to eat better for a while longer. Just enough for my stomach area to get better.

Anyway, I am not sure what to do for the rest of the day but I will try to update another blog later.

Not sure if my bestie is reading my blogs or not xD He don't always tell me if he does :p

He's still being stressed about a lot of things so he's not always feeling like talking to me or anything. Just have to wait until that day is over and wait until he gets rested and stuff.

I really hope for the best for him right now. I am not feeling well myself so I am trying my best to keep anything negative away from him. So far, that's... okay. Have to ask him sometime how I am doing about things xD

Alright, going back to watching YouTube for a while now... hope tomorrow will be good. And hope that I can update tonight.

That's all.

With love,

BDK

Monday, May 15, 2017

Sleepy And Dealing With Pain... :'(

Sleepy right now so I might be going to bed really soon.

Not sure what to put here since I am right now dealing with pain. :'(

Surgery sucks but hope it helps my body a bit more.

I still can't certain foods just yet... I wanted to test it out and my stomach just hurt instead... so no more of that. Lucky Salads are what are keeping me full some odd reason.

I have to take my pain meds now and get right to bed and hope to sleep all night without waking up again. I woke up last night from a strange and bad dream but I wasn't really feeling good so I just roll back in the bed and tried to sleep.

Not gonna deal with that pain again.... But the weirdest question is why I am dealing with pain only at night time? Is that when the healing works the best? Not sure...

Right now, I hope things goes well for my bestie, Rai. He seems to be dealing with a whole lot right now. Until he gets where he's going, I will tell you all why I hope things goes well for him. I think... if I forget, don't worry about it.

Anyway, sleepy time...

That's all.

With love,

BDK

I'm Getting Better Now

I am getting better now. I hope that things will get better through out this week and so forth.

I am slowly wanting to eat more and more whole foods... I guess I'm doing a whole lot better than I thought to be xD

I still can't bend over or lift without the risk of hurting inside and stuff.

I have to wait until the 22nd, next week to find out what the doctor says about my healing process xD

Anyway, I am doing good so that's the good news.

I will update a second post... only if I am awake. If I am sleepy and stuff by later, I might not get to do anything.

For now, I need to rest as much as I can. So I will take a nap for a bit now.

That's all.

With love,

BDK

Sunday, May 14, 2017

Well, That Was Awesome

I was watching Once Upon A Time and that was an interesting ending xD

So that was awesome owo

Anyway, I am going to put a short post here since I have been slow at updating and stuff...

My health is doing good. I am still having issues of my emotions being messed up. I think that's normal for surgeries and stuff. I guess I have to keep fighting these sudden down emotions xD

Also, I am eating more now without hurting. I ate another salad but a bit more. :D I might end up losing weight xD

I think I will be alright from this day on. Still can't lift until I get clearance from the doctor. I hope my mom can hold off for that long about me not lifting and stuff.

This week is gonna be good, I hope... I will be sure to post twice everyday as soon as I am fully able.

That's all.

With love,

BDK

Saturday, May 13, 2017

I Skipped A Post On Purpose

Yesterday, I wasn't feeling too good at all. I wanted to updated before going to bed but before I knew it, I had passed out.

Today, I was able to do a bowel movement. I waited for a long time to update this on this blog because I wasn't feeling good for a while. Right now, I feel good.

I can eat solids now that I have the bowel movement going well. I still have to be aware of other things as well. So go me.

Tomorrow, I am going to try to eat more foods through the day slowly but not that fast.

I don't think I will eat meat for a while so that's one thing that I do know. I just have no taste for it when I stare at it xD

I can eat salads so that's a plus. :D

Anyway, I will not post again today because I know that I might end up asleep early again. But the progress though... I am sleeping more at night slowly. Last night, I had fewer wake up moments.

Tonight, I hope to keep sleeping well... but there's no promises because now that I can move my bowels xD

No accidents, so that's good... it does worry me... Totally, didn't mean to scare my bestie earlier about it xD Sowwy, Rai.

Alright, time to go watch some videos for a while now.

That's all.

With love,

BDK

Friday, May 12, 2017

Feeling of Fullness

This is a second full day after having surgery... My biggest mistake? Eating solids yesterday. It made me not feeling too good for today. So that's when I realize that I shouldn't had done that... Not really my fault, just we wanted to test it out.

Today, I am feeling full but less and less so. I had to talk to my bestie the whole time while I was eating jello to help the feeling go away. Thanks to him, I was able to calm down. I hope he knows how awesome he is for that.

Anyway, I am sleepy now so I should try to find time to lay down and take it easy today. I hope to not feel like that anymore... So... eating only pudding, soup, jello and yogurt for today.

I will test eating solids again tomorrow but only in small qualities.

I am doing other normal things so I hope to do number 2 soonish. We'll see how I feel later. Right now? I want to snooze a little bit.

That's all.

With love,

BDK

Thursday, May 11, 2017

It's Not Gonna Be That Bad...

It's not gonna be that bad, it seems... I still hurt every once a while. I wish I could get my chair back in the living room but because it's hard to push it, I can't right now x.x

Anyway, I am not sure how tonight is gonna be. I didn't sleep too good last night but I was able to endure the pain as much as possible. This time, I'm gonna keep drinking water and inhaling in this thing do keep my lungs expanded.

However... I was able to watch how much I ate today. I have not been able to do number 2 yet... but hopefully that is soon!! I might have to get some fiber supplements to help that...

Right now, I just know things are gonna be weird for me and as well as for other people.

Life is just really... weird.

I am going to watch a few videos but I am just really waiting to take medication at 9 before deciding to go to bed. I hated sleeping on the couch last night so I was so happy to move into my room sometime really late last night xD

I hope that... things will be alright for all of us.

I will update tomorrow of how I slept and how I feel... Also, I'm not sure what time I get to take a shower yet... I know after 12 will be 48 hours... but I am going to wait on a quick shower until Saturday afternoon. My dad will be busy on that day anyway so good excuse to do that then :D

That's all.

With love,

BDK

PS: Prayers are needed for my grandma.

Freak Out Day But It's Calming Down

I almost freaked out because there was dried blood at my wound areas xD The doctor said it was fine xD

Anyway, not sure what to do since I am a bit calmer now.

I am praying for my grandma since the news came back that she has cancer in her mouth. Not sure what her decision is. It's entirely up to her.

And then my bestie has news that I won't mention here at all.

So much is happening to all of us.

I am eating normally but I can't eat anything with fats just yet. I hope that after a few weeks, I can gradually get back to that.

I have to see the doctor on Monday the 22nd of May. Hopefully things will be alright for me by then.

I just have to be careful of what I do and stuff.

I'm gonna go rest in a moment since I am just going on the PC a little by little.

I will update again tonight so keep an eye out for that.

That's all.

With love,

BDK

Wednesday, May 10, 2017

Back Home

I think by the time I gotten used to the place, my nerves went away. But what helped mostly, was being able to talk to my bestie. Thank you for that.

Anyway, I can tell you one thing... my throat is swollen xD I have to eat soft foods for a few days. But I don't mind that at all.

I have plenty of chicken noodle and more to eat.

I should talk about how I feel? Right now? Well, I am sleepy and more.

I did vomit once but that might not be the only time since I am still not over it just yet.

I am going to try to eat and rest more. I will try to update tomorrow. I'm glad I can sit here and type all of this though.

That's all.

With love,

BDK

Surgery Is Today

This blog will not be shared but it will be posted here as a reminder. I will be having surgery on my gallbladder today. I should be there by this time of this scheduled post.

All I really wish for is prayers and more. I might not get enough sleep before this time but I might not mention that. I might say something on twitter but don't be surprised if I don't.

If I recover and not get sick after the surgery and at home, I might post again. If there's no post for the rest of today, it's possible that I am resting at home.

Thank you for understand and prayers for me will be appreciated.

That's all.

With love,

BDK

Tuesday, May 9, 2017

Nervous For Tomorrow

I am really nervous about tomorrow. I have to get to bed early and that too makes me not sure if I can sleep.

To calm my nerves a little bit, I'm sitting by the faerie my bestie made me for my birthday on his server xD I guess... it assures me that he is thinking for me and hope that everything goes well for me.

I don't know what else to expect either... For tomorrow is just the day... I'm really don't know what to say. I just hope my bestie will wake up and noticed me and let me know that I'll be alright xD

Anyway, I am going to go to bed soonish so I want to watch a video or two before sleeping... which could mean no sleep for me... dang.

Also, I am going to make a scheduled post to pop up tomorrow but no shares... not sure how to make it automatically do that yet xD

That's all.

With love,

BDK

I Keep Forgetting To Update...

I keep forgetting to update since I am really nervous about tomorrow.

My mom asked if I wanted to back out but I told her nope xD

Why do parents make you even nervous about things?

Anyway, I am still gonna post a second post so keep an eye for that. I will also be doing something else but that will be mentioned in the second post.

Today, I have been trying to keep my mind positive and stuff... so wish me luck tomorrow.

That's all.

With love,

BDK

Monday, May 8, 2017

Too Tired For Anything

I didn't get to do the surveys as planned. I didn't get to record anything as planned. So... it's alright, I guess?

Anyway, I'm watching YouTube until I get too tired for anything else... and just go on to bed xD

Tomorrow, I know my nerves will be getting to me because it won't be long until Wednesday come around. I will try to record a video tomorrow, I hope. No promises though.

I will make one post ahead of time for Wednesday since I am not sure when I'll be posting for the day... might not get to post either.

Just hope everything will be alright for me on Wednesday.

That's all.

With love,

BDK

Plans For Today?

I'm a little late on things but that's only because it's Monday and you're kind of slow sometimes on those days xD

Anyway, I am going to do some surveys and if I have time, I am going to record a video on Minecraft. I want to do some adventure maps and some server things and... well, it won't be all Minecraft videos but I hope that things will be alright for that xD

Right now, I am going to go and do some stuff while waiting for nap time in a hour and 20 minutes from now. Still a while but yay.

This is a short post... so it's alright. I will be sure to post again later before going to bed.

That's all.

With love,

BDK

Sunday, May 7, 2017

Well, That Show Was Interesting...

The show Once Upon a Time had it's first every musical and well... that was interesting. That's all I can say without any spoils.

I am going to watch some videos which is just a mighty few before going to bed.

I am not entirely sure what I am going to do tomorrow besides trying to do surveys and stuff.

I am a bit nervous about Wednesday but hoping that talking to my bestie will calm my nerves would be best for me.

This post will be short so I'm just gonna go back to the video and sleep later.

That's all.

With love,

BDK

Got Some Things And Grandma's

So I got some things. I won't say much since they are bracelets and stuff. I'm gonna try to get back into wearing jewelry again xD

I did get some solar lights to put outside. They had bright colors this time and wanted them instead of all black.

I went to my grandma's earlier and had a good time being there. I sometimes wish that I could live closer there to be able to enjoy the nature a bit more.

Anyway, I'm not sure what to put here since my show is coming on tonight... It's a musical.

I think tomorrow, I'm gonna start doing stuff like surveys and more. I hope to at least get my mind to start on those. I know on Wednesday and maybe Thursday, I won't be able to do those.

Alright, I'm gonna post this and let you all know later how I think of a show with one episode that's all musical xD

That's all.

With love,

BDK

Saturday, May 6, 2017

Bed Gravity Is Real

Guys, bed gravity is real. Well, at least, it will be soon.

Anyway, I am going to go to bed in a few and hope to sleep early this time xD

Tomorrow, I am not sure what I'll be doing once I get back from my grandma's xD

I hope to type on this blog after I get back from there. I am thinking about things and need to do them after my surgery on Wednesday....

Also, I will be putting an auto blog for Wednesday reminding you all that I might not post for that day.

Alright, time to sleep since my mind is going fuzzy.

That's all.

With love,

BDK

Wal-Mart And Rain Doesn't Entirely Mix... (Nothing happened xD)

I went to Walmart today. I got a cake but I had no idea why I was so sleepy... I think it was because of the rain. So... it doesn't mixed too well.

Anyway, I was watching a video my bestie made and it was funny. He really loves trolling people on Minecraft xD

I am going to start making videos too but not sure when yet. I have to figure out that later on. Right now, I just want to go to sleep again xD

I think I will stay awake for a bit and hope that today will be good for the rest of the day xD

I will try to update again later so keep an eye out for that.

That's all.

With love,

BDK

Friday, May 5, 2017

Getting Sleepy Slowly

I am getting sleepy slowly... I am waiting for my bestie but I think he's gonna be asleep a while longer xD It's alright, we can talk another time and play another time on Grian's server.

Anyway, I am listening to a podcast on YouTube that features pewdiepie xD It's already starting in a wrong way but it's funny to listen to xD

I should leave a message to my bestie and go on to bed. Tomorrow is gonna be a long day for me. Not only that, but it's gonna be a dreary day :o Meaning rain all day long.

My birthday today had been a raining day and people were like "I hope you have a good day outside despite it's raining". Me: Never went out folks xD

Alright, gonna go now, might pause the rest of this podcast and get to bed then.

That's all.

With love,

BDK

Happy Birthday to Me~

I have been on Minecraft since I woke up this morning xD Mostly, receiving my gift for my birthday which ish a faerie and a mushroom home o3o

Here's the random pics:





















I'm happy that my bestie done this for me. :D He's awesome, you know?

Anyway, I am not sure what I'll be doing for the rest of the day besides playing random rounds of Grian's Disaster. I love those type of games and it's fun that they have it on Minecraft now xD

Alright, gonna end this now and post all these pics :D Happy Birthday to me and thank you, Bestie o3o

That's all.

With love,

BDK

Thursday, May 4, 2017

The Force, Me Have.

Knowing that other countries, May the 4th has already gone but here, it's still here for a few more hours. May the 4th is an unofficial holiday for Star Wars. It stated out as a joke but it gradually became something that will be known to the world. The force, me have.

Anyway, I did watch a movie after I went to the store. It was a bit late but got that done. Not sure when I'll be going to bed. My birthday is officially at midnight tonight. Going to be level 31 finally. Not a fun age but... hope things will be alright for me.

Also, I have news about my grandma but I won't say much until the results come in next week. I just want prayers for her to be made for now.

Right now, I am listening to the rain and it's making me very sleepy. Not sure why rain does that to you.

I will wait a while before going to bed and let my bestie know as well.

That's all.

With love,

BDK

It's A Rainy Day

I'm gonna get this done fast and since I am going to be going to the store in a couple of hours xD

Anyway, I'm eating right now. So this post will be short. I wish to have a cake tonight but because my birthday is tomorrow, the cake has to wait xD

I wish I could go see the movie Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2. I have to wait a while before watching it :/

Alright, I'm gonna end this post and watch a show for a bit. I'm waiting to watch a movie until after I get done with stuff.

That's all.

With love,

BDK

Wednesday, May 3, 2017

I'm About To Crash Because Really Tired For No Reason...

I'm about to crash and go to sleep. While at the same time, might pray for my bestie.

I am not sure what I'll be doing tomorrow yet but I might want to sleep for a bit. Well, maybe. I usually don't get to sleep late because of somebody here. Ah, well. I don't mind as long as I get to talk to my bestie.

Anyway, right now, I am afraid of typing too much I am really sleepy... and it's not fun to be this sleepy either xD

Bad me. Hope things be alright for all of us.

That's all.

With love,

BDK

Really Tired But Hope Things Be Alright...

I'm really tired and I hope things be alright. Today has been a really tiring day.

I went to get the pre op done and figure out that I am to come in for surgery at 9AM next Wednesday. Yay... not really... I'm nervous as heck.

Anyway, I am going to watch a movie and possibly be watching YouTube later xD

Not sure what else to do yet... Well, just finish watching the movie and stuff first. I will try to update another post later but it will be better than this if I do so.

That's all.

With love,

BDK

Tuesday, May 2, 2017

Nervous For Tomorrow...

Tomorrow, I will be going for pre op for the surgery. Still don't understand why they haven't called me to remind me yet... I just have to go there and see... The number they give me is wrong. Good job.

I'm praying for my bestie and be waiting for him. Hope things be alright for the both of us.

Because I am nervous about going tomorrow, I am not feeling good. Go me.

Anyway, I'm gonna keep this short and hope things will be alright for me. I need to get some rest too. Yay...

I just know tomorrow will be a long day. Might be a title tomorrow to remind you all.

That's all.

With love,

BDK

Running In Circles

I'm not really running in circles but that's how my mind is right now.

Nervous about some things for tomorrow. I will list one of them since I am having surgery next week.

Tomorrow, is what you would call pre op... it's a couple of tests to check my blood type, no other problems, etc. So yea, kind of nervous about it.

I am praying for my bestie as well... kind of nervous about him. Hope he doesn't see this and think I'm weird xD

Anyway, I hope things go well for me tomorrow. But then I'll be nervous once again as Wednesday comes close next week x.x

Hope things be alright for me one that day.

I got all my books in for my birthday. I ordered a Japanese workbook to help me learn Japanese a bit xD

Alright, I'm gonna go rest for a bit today... not sure what else to do.

That's all.

With love,

BDK

Monday, May 1, 2017

Nervous Even Though It's Not That Day Yet

I'm really nervous... a bit too nervous that I can only eat at a certain time... Yikes.

I'll be alright just I really don't know what to expect when Wednesday do come. I'll be busy with the pre op and hopefully, things will be alright.

I'm worried about my bestie as well. He hasn't been reading what I put on here so I will keep praying for him, myself and more.

Right now, I am going to find something to do until I get sleepy... yay me.

Alright, this is a short post since I don't really have anything else to say xD Just one thing... Rockcastle sure has been on the news a lot lately... this makes it the third week in a roll xD This time, it seems absurd a bit. Long story short: People got fired, claim it's not fair, etc. Yea...things can be weird at these times.

That's all.

With love,

BDK

Not Sure What's Gonna Happen Yet...

I am not sure what's gonna happen yet...

I don't usually want to talk about my mom but today, she's not feeling well. I usually need her to go with me in case I can't hear or anything. There are days that I cannot hear anything at all. I really wish she would watch what she eats because it's what is making her sick. Now, she's at the ER trying to figure out what's making her throw up reddish stuff that looks almost like blood. I really do pray her right now.

Also, I am praying for my bestie. This seems to be an odd week for my birthday week... So I pray for everything.

Anyway, I am going to go rest for a bit... I know it's late for me to rest but I need to and hopefully wait for my mom to call.

That's all.

With love,

BDK