There are memories that are hard to forget and sometimes even not forgotten due to some type of trauma.
The person had a bad trauma because of my family's doing. I was being blamed for it but I did warn that person a bunch of times, weeks and even days before that eventful day... Some people don't listen, you know?
Anyway, because of their trauma, it has become my trauma. Because in a way, I did want to see this person. But also in another way, I was scared. So were my family. They were so scared that things happened in the result.
I feel bad for it, okay? I will always feel so damn bad for it... I didn't really want to be reminded of that incident.
I know it might be bad to delete the post with such memory but seriously... I don't want to be reminded of it. It's the guilt that will drive my sanity up the wall.
I know such a harsh memory can be forgiven. We learn that much.
But should a memory be left alone? As long as it's not forgotten, it can be left alone.
I'm not a stable person when it comes to emotions. I might not show it, but damn it to hell, I am not a stable person.
I am sorry for many things. I am just hoping that it stays forgiven but leave the memory alone.... Don't forget it because that's what makes a person stronger.
Sorry for such a random unexpectedly post. I just wanted to get it off my chest. And as for what happened... I won't go into details for it. That's only saved for the right person at the right time.
That's all.
Happy Holidays,
BDK
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